This song by The Dream is quite the example of essential listening. It is about breaking up. Actually, it is the act of “making sense of breaking up”. It is these type of situations that become heavily complicated. Too many times, we try to make it work for the sake of “making it work”.

And you know what happens? We end up in situations constantly holding onto the past. We sit there and wonder: will this ever work out for the best?

Question:

Here is the situation:

I have an ex. We broke up because I lied to him about something.  But, he told me he forgives me. I texted another guy and I lied about who he was. I should of told him it was a guy who I went out on a few dates with.

We met up today so I can get my camera.  He said he may give me another chance in the future and he said he will always love me. I told him that I miss him and he said the same thing. We made out. Why did he ask to make out with me? I have no clue.

He also told me he will talk to me when he’s ready. When we left he gave me a hug and said to take care of myself and stay beautiful. Do you think he still cares about me? Do you think we may get back together in the future?

Answer:

I am not sure of what the future holds. However, it is painfully obvious that he still cares about you. Whether or not he is going to be with you is another situation in itself.

This is the thing about having an ex: you either need to make time to get back together or stay the hell away from each other. All of the “back and forth” is only productive in tennis matches. Even then, there is always someone else trying to come out on top. What we have to realize that tennis matches aren’t the best example for us to use in our romantic relationships. In short, the love that you see at Wimbledon refers to someone having points while the opposite player has nothing.

tennis-Wimbledon-Wilson-Roger-Federer-Andy-Murray-Novak-Djokovic-SW19-Grand-Slam-ATP-_413053-35

See what I just did up there? I just gave an education lesson without coming off preachy or pretentious.

If anything, you can see that he wanted to see if you “still had it for him”. All of the suggestive messages and the make out session? Part of that was a test to see how much love you still have for him (real love, not tennis love). The other part was to see how far he could get things to go after all of this time. Maybe it was an ego stroke. Maybe it was a sure fire way to make sure you still wanted him. Either or, his actions served a self-serving purpose: to reconfirm your affection for him.

Yessir!!!!

Yessir!!!!

At the end of the day, his intentions will become clear. While he still cares about you, it does not mean that he will automatically get back with you. For his own reasons, he still needed to know that you had love for him. Now that he has found that out, he is going to make a decision on how to approach the situation. Still, I would suggest you have your own backup plan just in case it doesn’t work out.

Think about it: if you are attractive enough for him, then there is going to be someone else that finds you compelling enough to date. That is unless you are plum crazy as hell.

 ‘Nuff Said and ‘Nuff Respect!!!

 

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