I know some of y’all remember this jam, right? I don’t care what anybody say: LL went in. I guess he was tired of messing around and/or messing up. It happens to the best of us. At least he took the time to realize his mistakes. For him, it was time to love his woman “better”.
Which leads to the next question:
What makes a relationship work? How do you keep a relationship successful?
Good question. And I have a two prong answer for all of those that want a better understanding:
1.) The Responsibility Approach: Albert Ellis, Ph.D and Robert A. Harper, Ph.D brought up the factor relationships work when people take on their responsibilities with consistency and persistence . What has to happen is not mainly about making the relationship work. It gets deeper: it is truly all about making the relationship and one’s own personal life work simultaneously into a beautiful, lush “bed of reality” . Their approach includes de-emphasizing over-romantic notions of compatibility (i.e. trying to find someone that “sweeps you off your feet”), accepting differences of action and reaction in your mate, and working on doing things together that are constructive. In turn, the two doctors look at functional relationships that dismiss all the neurotic fantasies for a dose of unified reality.
2.) The Challenge Facing Approach: Relationships come with challenges. In the mind’s eye of Judith S. Wallerstein, relationships have nine tasks, which include things such as “separating emotionally from the family of origin and investing in the marriage; building togetherness while maintaining individual autonomy; becoming a parent” . She even goes on to explain the different types of marriages. To her, there are four types: the traditional, romantic, rescue, and companionate . Her approach and mentality allows one to approach all types of difficulties.
Within both of these approaches are two main ingredients: communication and acceptance. People need to learn how to “talk to each other”. Many of us do too much “let me speak my peace while you listen and nod in approval so my ego is stroked and you do my bidding”. Damn it, THAT IS NOT EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION. BOTH parties need to say what they need to say and come to a happy medium. Acceptance of the fact that both have views and can come to a happy medium is what makes the relationship boat float.
With that said, taking one of the above approaches can bring some success. Still, you must have some quality communication and acceptance.
Now, I wonder how Chad Johnson is going to accept the failure of his reality TV farce of a union. Only time will tell.
‘Nuff Said and ‘Nuff Respect!!!