Gangsta Love.

Gangsta Love.

Side note: this posting is made for satire. It is serious in a highly vulgar and comical manner. However, if you are sensitive then don’t read this. Show it to someone that would either agree or disagree. I appreciate either one. Thank you in advance.

Love her or hate her, Kim Kardashian stays in headlines. We all understand that she attained the majority of her prestige through the use of home videos of Ray J pounding her pretty ass. However, being intelligent enough to parlay her profound beauty (and booty) into something bigger should be noted. Still, it bothers many that she is only famous for the sake of it. In the end, we have a female that uses her sexual mishaps and extended her 15 minutes of fame into her own personal industry.

Yet with all of her success, we have to note one of her biggest failures: her relationships. Sure, she has taken the time to be with the rich and famous. I commend her for that. However, if you are known for having a marriage for the sake of marriage then what can be said? Much of her relationships seem like a publicity stunt (intentional or not).

Then again, I think the same can be said for her AND her sisters (and even the MOM!). Let me make a run at how this theoretical madness works in my mind:

Claims to fame.

Claims to fame.

Ray J – Let us keep it real: Ray J was mainly known as “Brandy’s brother”. Hell, even Brandy called him “Brandy’s brother” (shouts to Maronzio Vance). All of a sudden, he taps Kim’s pretty ass on a homemade video and gets a small resurgence in the fame he never really had in the first place. After a few songs (or whatever) and a reality show that featured tattooed faced people not named Gucci Mane and a future porn star, what was his recent claim to fame. Making a diss track to Kanye that notes “he hit it first”. Such attention whore behavior. ‘Tis life, though.

Man, I actually feel sorry for dude.

Man, I actually feel sorry for dude.

Lamar Odom – Before he ever gotten a taste of Kardashian coochie, he was a championship player for the Los Angeles Lakers. After messing around with Khloe just to get married, it all went downhill. First of all, he became a NBA drifter once the Lakers traded him. Then, he became a non-existent player through injuries and slack-ass play. Now, the rumors are that he is cracked out somewhere buying rocks like Rick James in his heyday. Damn, Khloe’s husband Lamar. What happened?

Is this the equivalent to living a good life, Lamar? Smoking rocks like Gator and Pookie?

I mean, if we REALLY want to keep it real.....

I mean, if we REALLY want to keep it real…..

Kris Humphries: I mean, you blink once and he was married to Kim. You blink twice and he was separated while Kim was caressing Kanye’s nut sack. To actually be used as a publicity stunt for a reality show has to sting. However, he may be recovering from the foolishness that is The Kardashians. One only hopes.

The same thing I'm saying, Bruce Kardashi...I mean, Jenner.

The same thing I’m saying, Bruce Kardashi…I mean, Jenner.

Bruce Jenner – Emasculation. That is the word that comes to mind when I think about Bruce Jenner. I mean, just look at how he is presented on the TV show. His name should be Bruce Kardashian. But then again, their relationship seems to be “on the rocks”. Yet, those are only rumors. Can’t always trust rumors.

He is the only won that has been "winning" of sorts.

He is the only won that has been “winning” of sorts.

Scott Disick – Entrepreneur/party animal Scott Disick may be the smartest one of them all. Yes, he has Kourtney. Yes, he has two children by her. But he seems to be the one with the most upside out of all of these situations. If anything, he has laid the pimp hand on strong. Maybe it is the fact that he probably has the most balls out of all the men mentioned. Or maybe Kourtney doesn’t have the potent loving that the other sisters have. Might need to step it up, Kourtney!

Some have every reason to believe this.

Some have every reason to believe this.

Kanye West – Last, but not least, we have Kanye West. It is bad enough that he picked up Kim while she was still married to Kris Humphries (aren’t they still married at this moment?). Now, he has a daughter with her by the name of North West (you can’t make this stuff up). In the meantime, you can always catch Kanye beating up paparazzi or making shitty albums that scrotum-hugging-people praise to be musical genius. Kim won this round.

You can agree or disagree. However, that Kardashian coochie seems to be something fierce and dangerous. It may not be as positive and culture shattering as the one Erykah Badu. However, one has to note how the negative tends to occur once men get a taste of anything Kardashian. I guess it is time for those chicks to walk around with a letter “L” around their necks for “lethal”. Or just a “K” for “killer”.

Well, THAT makes sense.

Well, THAT makes sense.

Whatever works.

‘Nuff Said and ‘Nuff Respect!!!

Enhanced by Zemanta